If those weren’t enough to give you a reality check, here’s more:

Watch Your Energy

Absorbing tremendous amounts of negative and angry energy requires you to take care of your own vibration field. I find that people who are not spiritually inclined or do not believe in energy are not qualified for this work. As I’ve said before, it is not easy to take in what people spew out. There will be things you will hear that will make your blood boil or cause your hope for a better world to diminish at every turn. This factor alone will scare you away from the profession if you do not manage your energy levels. As a Listener, I do not advocate for talking about your clients or their stories to anyone, unlike therapists who are trained to speak to ‘supervisors’. I also do not approve of maintaining a personal diary as an outlet as it risks getting found. The way you practice will need to work out what outlet in your mind you create for managing your well-being.

Biases Will Blind You

If you have preconceived notions about a race, nationality, ethnicity, culture, language, gender, sexual orientation or religion, this work is not for you. Listening is about connecting as a human species. If you currently hold grudges, anger and have yet to forgive people in your own life, I suggest working through it before taking on Listening clients. We all have biases, but you will need to put them aside for the individual across you. This is essential when doing Listening work and is the first principle in witnessing the healing journey of others. You will have to possess the quality of hyper-awareness of your own self, your feelings and learn to self-manage your biases and prejudices of the people, places, cultures you are ignorant about. Allowing biases to creep up will taint your listening process. This work is about who you are, rather than the technique you use. The process, technique, practice and nuances of the craft come alive when you know who want to be.

Formal Study of Philosophy

Perhaps the only competency or skill required from the best listeners is that they will have studied not only counseling, therapy, psychology or any of fields related to the Humanities, but also be philosophically trained. By this I mean you will need to be familiar with the major schools of eastern and western thought (ontology, epistemology, etc.) because this applies when clients begin to ask for your perspective. Let me be very clear that in this work, there is no advising. Rather the client comes to their own conclusions, answers, action plans to forge their own path. But as a Listener, you will be asked for your perspective. Notice I didn’t say ‘opinion’. At most, Listeners offer higher-level perspectives which draw from philosophical insight and study of the humanities. You will never offer a personal opinion or an “I think you should do this” response.

More Than Money

The last thing I’d like to say about this work is most important. If you are into this work for money, you aren’t offering the real craft. Neither should you practice Listening without getting paid. All I’m saying is that your purpose has to be clear to you. My purpose is spiritual practice related to non-judgment of others. Without defining your purpose and getting specific about the impact you want to create for others, you will be sucked in by the emotional turbulence of this work. Your own life’s issues will be magnified, and you will follow the likes of many therapists who are trained to bury human connections in their professional work. Listeners do the opposite by experiencing what their client is facing without putting a label to any human suffering.

If you are brave enough to say ‘yes’ to these questions, you are on your way –

Are you ready to let people deviate from the norms of the world?

Have you forgiven family, friends, colleagues or others who have caused you pain?

Can you listen without offering your own opinion?

Are you able to remain neutral in the face of offensive comments or immoral acts?

Can you accept other religions and beliefs as ‘truth’ no matter how far they are from yours?

Do you believe the idea that there is no right and wrong in ethics and no ‘one truth’?

Have you been a formal student of philosophy?

Can you keep secrets and maintain the utmost confidentiality?

Please consider these questions carefully. When you feel ready, start listening to people around you. Do not go convincing them that they need your help. People will open up naturally when they see that you do not judge, condemn or criticize. Do not get caught up in starting a formal practice without first listening to strangers on the bus, the train, on sidewalks or in the elevator. Start practicing right where you are, with a smile, a greeting, a helping hand, or a random act of kindness. Be who you are and the techniques will come through.